I've mentioned on more than one occasion about the importance of behaviors being consistent with emotion, and I feel like I could do a better job explaining it in it's own entry.
To put it simply, when I say "consistent" I mean like if someone says they're really sad about something, their body language should reflect that (shoulder low, head down, arms stiff, face distorted, etc.). What a sad person wouldn't be doing is bouncing up and down, walk with light steps, and have a smile. Looking for inconsistency is key in determining whether or not someone is being dishonest.
How do I know which cues are important?
Another thing to look out for is the length of time it takes for the behavior to appear after the person expressed their emotion. An honest nonverbal behavior is instant and will always begin slightly before the person finishes saying their thoughts. For example a happy person, when asked "how are you doing?", would crack a smile right before they say "great!" A dishonest signal would require thought, and usually will come after the statement.
As long as you're looking at their face, you should probably also note the immediate reaction to "how are you doing?" If the person is truly upset about something, they may actually give you a frown before they lie and answer "good." This, and any type of honest signal happens in a split-second, so don't blink!
This seems like a tough thing to practice.
This concept makes perfect sense in my head, but I'm having a pretty difficult time putting it down on e-paper so I hope this is at least making some sense to you, too. The easiest thing you can do is simply ask someone "how are you doing?" and see how they respond. The most effective way to practice is figure out if the person is having a bad day before you ask because most people will lie about having a bad day. Just remember what you learned and try to match what you hear with what you see.
Navarro, J. (2008). What Every BODY Is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People. New York: Harper Collins.
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